Push-Pull is Flirting for Sociopaths


Source: Indexed, Jessica Hagy

One of the most insidious results of hookup culture is the retreat to the Principle of Least Interest – which says that the person who cares the least in a relationship is the one with the most power. 

Although research shows that most college students would prefer a relationship over casual sex, it’s become uncool to feel that way. It’s most prevalent among guys, but girls also fake indifference about relationships. They go for the casual hookup hoping it will turn into something more. 

Back in the days when traditional dating was the norm, playing hard-to-get was a viable strategy for women.

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Book Review: Skin In the Game

skinI first encountered Neely Steinberg in 2010 when she wrote a piece for the Boston Globe entitled Dating Like an Entrepreneur. As someone who frequently thinks of dating in behavioral economic terms, I was drawn to the pragmatic and sensible model she described. Shortly thereafter, she invited me onto her local call-in radio show to talk about dating and hookup culture. We’ve remained in touch since then, and it’s been a pleasure to see her develop a successful career as a dating coach for women.

Now Neely has written Skin In the Game: Unleashing Your Inner Entrepreneur to Find Love

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Divorce in America: Who Really Wants Out and Why

frivolityUntil now, there has been a dearth of information about divorce in America. We have census information about the number of divorces, and we also have a sense of divorce according to socioeconomic status. However, since the advent of no-fault divorce we no longer know why people divorce (not that the old classifications of “irreconcilable differences” or “cruelty” told us much). 

Historically, women have initiated about two-thirds of divorces, and that remains true today:




1867 62%
1880 67%
1922 68%
1931 73%
1960 70%
Today 66%

Source: Brinig and Allen, 2000

Men’s rights activists routinely describe female-initiated divorce as a frivolity, lacking seriousness and sense.

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Are Men Turned Off By Self-Confident Women?

small valueDear Susan,

I had a pretty interesting conversation with a guy friend a couple of months ago. He asked about my love life, I said that there wasn’t much going on, and he told me that he thought that my only problem was that I was “too confident and too direct” for most guys.

For some reason it reminded me of something the mother of my oldest friend once said to me: “You have everything going for you but you’re too self-sufficient and men need to know you need them.”

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Check Out These Top New Links From Around the Web

Every week I find many more articles and topics than I can possibly write about. I’m developing a weekly newsletter that will deliver this great content straight to your inbox, but in the meantime, here are the top new links that caught my attention:

1. She did in two months what I have been unable to accomplish in five years. 

Nepotism alert! 

Claire Globe

You may recall that my daughter Claire founded the Boston lifestyle blog Beacon Street Chic in February. The Boston Globe has already discovered it and featured her in the Sunday Arts section!

She’s also attracted her first corporate sponsor. And all this in addition to a demanding job. I’m so proud of her, and it’s a pleasure to watch her eclipse me. :) 

Claire paper

2. 18 Signs You Probably Shouldn’t Be Dating Him

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